Seriously?

This morning I had to call...The District. It was going to be a delicate operation at best, because I couldn't very well call and say "Hi there! I need some of my personal information to complete a form that is being used in a grievance against you. Have a great day!". Still, it's my file, and I should have access to it, right? Right???



Call #1:

Me: Hello, I'm calling to confirm ____________.

Doofus: I can say yes or no.

(does she mean that she has the right to refuse me my own information? That doesn't sound entirely legal)

Me: Okay. I would like to confirm my _____________.

Doofus: Go ahead.

Me: I know it's _______(partial answer) but I need ________.

D: Yes. _______ is correct.

Me: Okay, what's the rest of it?

D: I can't tell you.

This went on for several minutes, most of which was me being put on hold. Finally it was explained to me that I could say the thing I needed, and she could tell me if it was right.

Me: Seriously, this is how we're doing this?

D: Yes.

Me: Okay. So you mean I have to guess, and if I guess right you'll tell me? (didn't I play this game in middle school when a friend liked a guy but didn't want to say who?)

D: Yes.

Me: **Takes guess**

D: NO.

Me: **Takes second guess**

D: NO. You only get one guess. Goodbye.


Call #2 was to my school to see if I could get the information that way. The secretary was in a meeting, so I gave my number and waited for her call. Meanwhile, let's try downtown again, shall we? Maybe I'll get someone different, someone friendlier.


Call #3:
Phone rings uninterrupted for a full minute. No one picks up, no voice mail. They know it's me, I'm sure of it.


Call #4:

Me: Hello, I'm calling to confirm _________.

Rude Lady (different from Doofus): Listen, we already told you *long rant restating info*.

So they know it's me. They've been discussing me. Greeeaaaaat.

Me: Yes, I have some questions about that.

Rude: Well, *dismissive rude rant* Why do you need this information?

Me: Because I need it.

Rude: WHY DO YOU NEED THIS INFORMATION?!

Me: Look, I just do. If I come in will that help?

Rude: NO. Here's the fax number. 213--

Me: Hang on one second please, I need to get a pen so I can --

Rude: Hold please.

**elevator music**

Rude: The number is 213blahblahblah. Goodbye.


Luckily, the secretary called back later and we pieced together the right date from my records, and the faulty guess I'd made earlier. And if those two ladies are ever in my position, I hope that someone is just as helpful to them as they were to me.